Fifteen Things I do not like, in no particular order and just because I feel some bile coming up

1. The anxious feeling I get when, sat on the top deck of the bus, I hear a gaggle/herd of screeching teenagers come up the stairs. It's a mixture of intense, armpit-moistening annoyance, and fear; I'm not impressed with myself about the fear aspect.
   
   2. Blue mascara. On other people, since I would not touch the stuff unless they paid me. Sometimes My Own Mother wears it and this feels me with Horror. Ensues a Serious Talk (from me to her) reminding her of all the people we don't like who also wear it and why we don't want to be like them.
   
   3. Waking up every morning, unfailingly, at 4.40. Then waking up again at 5.011, which is too close to 6 for me to fall back to sleep properly.
   
   4. Not getting over what my dentist once said to me: today, you've had more work done that I ever had in my entire life. I had to make him repeat to make sure I'd heard it right. What??
   
   5. Scrabble.
   
   6.Beige. Navy blue. Bottle green. Maroon. As well as pastel colours on adults.
   
   7. People who don't return what I lent them. Books, DVDs, socks. I just don't understand.
   
   8. Seeing children, especially girls, wearing uncomfortable clothes. Frilly pink frocks. To me, it only confirms that some parents have the worst reasons for having children in the first place.
   
   9. Parents screaming at their offsprings in public. Because when they do it in private, I'm not there to see it. Clearly.
   
   10. Loud little boys with hair shaved down to a 1 wearing football shirts. It makes me very very sad.
   
   11. Yappy little dogs and usually their owners. Which is unfair. It's not the dogs' fault if they look like retarded rats owned by bipeds who really want fluffy toys.
   
   12. The fact that Spam and corned beef did not disappear after the end of Rationing. And the fact that it's all that some people can afford to eat.

   13. Trifle, cucumber sandwiches, fish paste for sandwiches, cheese and onion crisps – those monuments of British culinary tradition.

   14. Being patronised. Being told something I already know.

   15. Long nails on hands or even worse, on feet.