Like a husband coming home late smeared in some hussy’s red lipstick and smelling of cheap fragrance, my cat has been returning home smelling of fish.
I’m clearly being cheated on here.
Who is the mermaid luring him away?
Perhaps it’s the old Italian lady next door, the One Of The Gigantic Knickers.
Anyhow, the moggy’s got it coming. I shall craft a little pendant thing with the words ‘Do not feed me, I’m a greedy, lying, cheating fat arse’. and possibly make little flyers for people’s letter boxes.
Feel free to place an order if you have a similar kind of spouse.
I have other things to report, people of blogland, but there is coconut cake to be had, so farewell for now.
9 comments:
Wow, a cholesterol blog! I think I'm going to pee myself.
Shut up. Polluter.
Perhaps that's why the cat strays. He's fed up with you peeing on him.
That's cats for you. Fickle little shits. Mine disappeared once for three weeks, she was found camping out in someone's very warm cosy greenhouse, being fed, pretending to be a stray. They're ruthless.
Heh. Gotta love those classy cholesterol blogs. They're just EVER so interesting. ...wait, what was that URL again...?
Your pussy has strayed because the Italian lady next door knows how it's done in Italy
I lost my cat to a better feeder and that is not a euphemism *sniff* They are heartbreakers.
I take offence at the mermaid insinuation -- mermaids don't even LIKE cats, for fuck's sake!
Mermaid: well Italian mermaids do. honest.
Fuzzy lollipop, I'm taking heed of your bitter experience.
Musici- grumpff. If they put Stuff On Their Cats, so can I.
anne- I know.. You should link it.
Saesnes - yes. I wonder if you can instill guilt in a cat, and if so, how.
Greavsie- It was only a hollow threat.
Yeah, my little cat (Ok, he's not *that* small) keeps coming home smelling of perfume. Cheeky git then turns his nose up at the expensive cat food he's been happily chopming through for weeks! :S
I think your tag idea is brilliant.
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