Fifth Wheel

When I was eleven I had two best friends. Both were very pretty, in different ways, both tall and popular in a giggly kind of way. All three of us were in the same class for our first year of secondary school. We started a newspaper together and handed it out to the class. We had sleepovers and we fancied the same boys. We practiced kissing together. We did.
Whenever pairing up was called for, it always seemed to be the two of them, and me. They sat together in class. During the 12-hour coach journey to London we took at the end of term, they sat side by side, whispering about that blue-eyed boy who looked just like that actor whose name I don’t remember now. They swapped clothes; not with me, though, because I was clearly shorter and skinnier.
I was doing better in class than either of them, but they both got to wear a bra much earlier than I did.

When I was thirteen, I had two best friends.. not as pretty as the ones I’d had previously, but trying hard. We were not as creative as we’d been; some phenomenon had happened to us all and we were way past writing newspapers. We fancied the same boys, ferociously so. Whenever some pairing up was called for, however, it always seemed to be the two to them. I understood. After all they were so much more grown up than I. They’d started their Period. That was fine, I was doing better in class than the both of them combined.

When I was 15, I had two best friends. Pretty. Clever. Well-stacked. Whenever the situation called for some pairing up…
I was fine. In the space of three months, I got a first boyfriend, then a second one, and I was the first in the class to have sex. Then we didn’t talk so much anymore, as their parents disapproved of me for some reason.

When I was 19, I had a best friend. Seriously stacked. We compared university grades, made Goth clothes and went to Goth clubs. We lived in different cities, though, so she had to get herself another best friend; it was too lonely otherwise. I think she’s married with two kids, now. She called me from Ireland three years ago, but I never returned her phone call.