Hey big spender, spend a little time with me

1. On a sunny spring afternoon after school, I race around my neighbourhood on my brand new blue bike, trying the muscles in my 10-year-old body. It’s become one of my favourite pastimes, relatively safe; there aren’t too many cars in that part of my little town. Up the street, and down, at the highest speed I can muster; then leisurely, for there is a girl my age sitting on the pavement. Up and down the street, I eye her up. I could make a new friend! Up and down again, I have such a cool new bike. She’s noticed me! Casually I sit next to her on the hot tarmac and start chatting. Her name’s Gaelle, she’s new to the area, she doesn’t have a bike; what can we do? I don’t know her enough to invite her back to my house. We sneak into a garden and pick cherries til we’re sick of them. We try to break into an empty house nearby but soon give up; she fears there might be ghosts. We mosey on down to the shop around the corner; the old lady owner sells toys and sweets. I know what we can do, we can buy stuff! I’m back on my brand new blue bike, race home, break my piggy bank and return, triumphant. We walk out with bags of flavoured gums and water pistols. Score! I’ve made a new friend.

2. These days it’s harder to find girls sitting on pavements waiting for me to turn up and chat to them. What am I to do?

3. Perhaps the key to successful scoring lies in one or a combination of the following things:

bike
forbidden fruit
transgression
money

4. It got me a girl all those years ago, didn’t it?
Sort of.


Perhaps I should learn to ride a bike. One of those big 900 ones that come with a cool leather outfit.