Dreams, dreams, dreams
Sometimes in my REM sleep I take a long enough break from puking cats to have dreams that I can only describe as Sort Out My Life Dreams..
So today, people of blogland, I give you:

SOML dream #1
In this one, I am compiling extracts from A’s blog or emails that are particularly vengeful or obnoxious or petty. To me, to her friends, whatever. Just plain bad. It makes for a long text, that I can refer to in times of acute missing her. To put me off, you know. Puncture the balloon of obsession with the pointy spikes of reality. Brutally open the oven door on the rising soufflé of idealisation. I’ve got more metaphors, just ask.

Awake, this idea doesn’t strike me as quite as judicious as it did in the dream. More masochistic than anything else, actually. So I won’t do it. Hey, I’m crazy and obsessive, but not that crazy.

SOML dream #2
The kettle explodes and stops working. End of dream.

In real life, the kettle that I never paid for 9 and a half years ago is indeed boiling its last bubbles. So in my heart I blessed Yoko, the cute Japanese exchange student next door who gave it to me before returning to Tokyo, and I gave the kettle a decent sepulchre. Then I went to Argos and gazed at their Laminated Book of Dreams, and purchased a kettle; (We all know why they laminate it, don’t we; to catch the tears of joy at all the wonderful things that can be had.)
[note for the non-initiated and other foreigners: Argos is exactly like a shop, only different, since you pick everything from a catalogue (laminated), and a nice person hands you your purchase over a counter. Then you try to get home on the bus with a giant box with a fridge in it.]

Whenever I find myself marvelling at house appliances, two images come to mind:
1. Muriel’s mother in Muriel’s wedding, staring absent-mindedly at a mug of water being microwaved. That bit is shortly before she goes crazy and has to be locked up.
2. Enid’ best friend in Ghost World on moving into her new apartment, which includes a special cupboard for the ironing board. She gets excited about it; it’s the end of a beautiful friendship.
Therefore I hope I don’t get any more SOML dreams of a domestic nature. They kinda scare me.

I’m off to do yoga. To try and achieve a balance. You know.