Homophobia and my mother
1. 1987, April, Kitchen at home
A stranger told me she liked my style!, I chirp excitedly.
Really? You should be careful; it was probably a lesbian. my mother replies.
2. 1989, September, same.
Mum, if I’m understanding properly the theories in Introduction to psychoanalysis, and if we consider the lack of positive male role models in our family, [my brother] and I should both be gay homosexuals. I blurt out.
Where did you read that drivel?
It’s only Freud. I reply, with a detached air of superiority.
She sniggers. What rubbish. Go finish your homework and stop being so disgusting.
3. 2004, December, on the phone
What you need is to meet someone else. I don’t care if it’s a man or a woman, but you need someone. she said as a feeble and frivolous attempt to galvanise me out of depression.
4. 2005, April, on the phone after a week holiday with a long time friend of hers
She’s nice, but so close minded, and she says such stupid, offensive things..
like what? , I prod.
A slight pause. Well, like ‘he’s such a fucking fag’, ‘bunch of faggots’, you know.. she trails off, embarrassedly. I know she won’t have challenged her friend. She won’t. Not just yet.
But don’t you think she’s really made an awful lot of progress?
Michel Simon dans un musée du sexe ?
4 years ago
8 comments:
Yes, impressive steps forward. I think I fail to appreciate often enough how lucky I am to have an accepting mother. Thanks for reminding me to be greatful.
God yes Y - that's very impressive indeed.
I sometimes wonder what my very old fashioned and very asian folks would do if i was a lesbian.
Your Ma's doing blaaaaahdy well.
x
anne: _was_ bi? insinuating that you're not anymore? *is confused*
y: go your mum! she should get at least 3 rainbow stars. :-)
Mine thought Gay = Extremely happy and it was always best to leave it that way I think.
Slowly, but surely-!
ooooh, i'm so very sorry anne. my poor excuse for a brain obvioulsy completely mangled that sentence.. whoops. makes perfect sense now.
*blushes and leaves sheepishly*
It doesn't sound as though your mother was ever as homophobic as the friend she quotes, though. There's nothing here of her words that's really that bad, for her generation, don't you think?
And she is so small, besides. :)
Vanessa - actually my mother is quite exceptional in many ways. Sometimes I forget, sometimes I wish she weren't, so i'd have something serious to moan about...;-)
Post a Comment